My earliest memories of reading are not curled up in the lap of my mother or father reading bedtime stories. It wasn’t that my parents did not value education or reading, but rather the stress of managing a home on a limited income with three small children took every bit of my mother’s energy, leaving little time for bedtime stories. Reflecting back I remember my mother reading thick books, checked out from the local library, on the living room couch while we played on the floor. Reading was my mother’s escape from a reality of laundry, cooking, cleaning and caring for the family. I could tell my mother loved this escape and was eager to move from one book to the next. I was always amazed at how quickly she could make it through those thick books. My father was completely on the other end of the spectrum. I cannot ever remember my father reading a book. Busy making a living for his family, he only read to gain necessary information – operation manuals, maps and selected articles from a magazine. While his preferred method of gaining news was through television, every morning he could be found sitting at his regular kitchen barstool with coffee in one hand and the daily local newspaper spread across the kitchen bar.
I began reading in the first grade. I vividly remember the Dick and Jane books we brought home nightly from first grade to practice. I read these to my father while my mother cooked dinner. I can remember the teacher who taught me to read, Mrs. Felty. We met around her small round table in groups of four to read aloud. I can still hear her words, “Sound it out!” I was never a confident reader. As I progressed in grades, I always dreaded my turn in the classroom read aloud. My nervousness caused my voice to quiver. I could hear the poor fluency in my reading as I compared it to the other students in my class. The more I worried about how badly I was reading aloud, the worse my fluency got. When reading silently, I read very slowly and mouthed the words as I read. My third grade teacher pointed out mouthing the words as you read is a definite sign of a poor reader. However, I comprehended everything I read and my grades were excellent. My confidence was further shaken in fourth grade when a teacher conducted an informal reading test rating me average to below average, thus establishing my reading group for the entire year. All my friends were rated higher and moved up a level, leaving me behind. With the low confidence in my reading ability, I did not read for pleasure. I read the required books to make good grades, but one did not find a book in my hands if it wasn’t for a grade. However, I loved to write stories. I would spend hours in my bedroom after school writing fictional stories with interesting characters. I would then take my stories to school for my friends to read. In middle school an English teacher cultivated my love of writing. She taught the class how to make our stories come alive. She encouraged us to make our readers feel the story. She made writing fun and reading the stories of our classmates interesting. By the end of Jr. High, we all felt like we were authors. Though I loved writing, my reluctance to read for pleasure would not change until I became an adult.
As an adult I have come to enjoy reading. I no longer feel like my reading skills are being judged and compared to others. I enjoy perusing through a magazine to find articles that catch my interest. The Sunday morning edition of the Dallas Morning News is a favorite. I love thumbing through the thick paper to find travel, religion and world news. Reading allows me to learn, question and see another’s point of view. As a mother I want my children to enjoy reading. I fluently read aloud to them without any concerns. I realized, my fears of how I sound were unfounded and the more I read aloud the better I get at it. However, I have watched my children’s early curiosity for books fade as they struggle to put the reading puzzle together. I can see the same fear in their eyes when they are asked to read aloud. Their confidence is being chipped away and reading is a requirement rather than a pleasure. For some kids reading comes easy, but for some it is difficult and hard work. It is those who find it hard that can easily have their confidence shattered.
It has been beneficial to review my literacy history to date. It required me to reflect and discover things about my reading that I never before realized. Confidence is an important part of the reading puzzle and such a very fragile component. As teachers, it is important to be sensitive to this in the early stages of reading. To instill a love of reading, our students must be confident in their reading abilities. It is easy for teachers to praise their good readers. But is possibly more important for teachers to encourage their struggling readers. Encouragement builds confidence and is far more likely to create lifelong learners who enjoy reading.
I began reading in the first grade. I vividly remember the Dick and Jane books we brought home nightly from first grade to practice. I read these to my father while my mother cooked dinner. I can remember the teacher who taught me to read, Mrs. Felty. We met around her small round table in groups of four to read aloud. I can still hear her words, “Sound it out!” I was never a confident reader. As I progressed in grades, I always dreaded my turn in the classroom read aloud. My nervousness caused my voice to quiver. I could hear the poor fluency in my reading as I compared it to the other students in my class. The more I worried about how badly I was reading aloud, the worse my fluency got. When reading silently, I read very slowly and mouthed the words as I read. My third grade teacher pointed out mouthing the words as you read is a definite sign of a poor reader. However, I comprehended everything I read and my grades were excellent. My confidence was further shaken in fourth grade when a teacher conducted an informal reading test rating me average to below average, thus establishing my reading group for the entire year. All my friends were rated higher and moved up a level, leaving me behind. With the low confidence in my reading ability, I did not read for pleasure. I read the required books to make good grades, but one did not find a book in my hands if it wasn’t for a grade. However, I loved to write stories. I would spend hours in my bedroom after school writing fictional stories with interesting characters. I would then take my stories to school for my friends to read. In middle school an English teacher cultivated my love of writing. She taught the class how to make our stories come alive. She encouraged us to make our readers feel the story. She made writing fun and reading the stories of our classmates interesting. By the end of Jr. High, we all felt like we were authors. Though I loved writing, my reluctance to read for pleasure would not change until I became an adult.
As an adult I have come to enjoy reading. I no longer feel like my reading skills are being judged and compared to others. I enjoy perusing through a magazine to find articles that catch my interest. The Sunday morning edition of the Dallas Morning News is a favorite. I love thumbing through the thick paper to find travel, religion and world news. Reading allows me to learn, question and see another’s point of view. As a mother I want my children to enjoy reading. I fluently read aloud to them without any concerns. I realized, my fears of how I sound were unfounded and the more I read aloud the better I get at it. However, I have watched my children’s early curiosity for books fade as they struggle to put the reading puzzle together. I can see the same fear in their eyes when they are asked to read aloud. Their confidence is being chipped away and reading is a requirement rather than a pleasure. For some kids reading comes easy, but for some it is difficult and hard work. It is those who find it hard that can easily have their confidence shattered.
It has been beneficial to review my literacy history to date. It required me to reflect and discover things about my reading that I never before realized. Confidence is an important part of the reading puzzle and such a very fragile component. As teachers, it is important to be sensitive to this in the early stages of reading. To instill a love of reading, our students must be confident in their reading abilities. It is easy for teachers to praise their good readers. But is possibly more important for teachers to encourage their struggling readers. Encouragement builds confidence and is far more likely to create lifelong learners who enjoy reading.